The online world is, for all intents and purposes, a weird place to run a business… especially if you have a personal brand. That’s who I work with most — online health and fitness coaches building sustainable businesses. And one of the biggest hang-ups I see is this: deciding what to share as a personal brand, and what to keep private.

Do people need to see your three kids and know their names? Is it really necessary for them to know if you shave your butthole? (But seriously — do they?)

I’m Annie Miller, and I help you build a sustainable online health and fitness business without selling your soul to vanity metrics. Inside my programs, we help you create your own social media code of conduct — and that’s what I hope you’ll start building by the end of this post.

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First: You Get to Choose

First and foremost, you are in charge of what gets shared and what stays behind closed doors. Yes, these platforms are technically not “yours,” but your voice and your content absolutely are. So, if it doesn’t feel good to share something, then don’t share it.

For example, I don’t share my son’s name or face online. That’s a boundary I’ve chosen for a few personal reasons. But mainly, it’s because he has nothing to do with my business. Yes, I’m a mom, and that definitely shapes how I navigate business. However, my audience doesn’t need to know every detail about my child in order to learn from that experience.

The same might not be true for you — and that’s completely fine. What matters is that you decide what’s aligned for your business, your brand, and your comfort level.

Start by Locating the Tension

If you’re unsure where the boundary is, start by noticing where the tension shows up. Where do you feel most hesitant or pressured to share?

If there’s something you truly don’t want to share, that’s reason enough. You don’t need a deeper explanation. Simply feeling like it’s too personal or that your audience doesn’t deserve that level of access is valid. So, don’t over-explain it. Just don’t share it.

On the other hand, if it’s something you do want to share, but you’re unsure how much or in what way, that’s where discernment comes in. Ask yourself:

• What part of this experience would actually benefit my audience?
• Is there a segment I could share that still protects what I want to keep private?
• What context would be helpful or relatable, without feeling invasive?

In most cases, you don’t have to share every gritty detail for something to be meaningful. Often, a small glimpse is more than enough.ething to be meaningful. Often, a glimpse is enough.

You’re Not Them

If you find yourself looking at someone else’s content thinking, “Wow, I could never share that,” or “Should I be sharing that too?” — pause.

They are not you. Their brand is not yours. You don’t have to do what they do. They may have different boundaries, goals, or values. You get to define what’s right for your business.

That’s the entire point of a personal brand: it’s personal.

Even the Light Stuff Can Feel Heavy

Not all boundaries have to be around deeply personal topics. Maybe you feel weird sharing your daily routine or what you’re wearing to the gym. Maybe you think, “Who cares?”

But the reality is, the seemingly boring things — like frownie patches, pets, your mustache wax routine — are often what build daily connection. They’re what people remember. They make you feel human. They invite trust.

Start small. Think about what you enjoy seeing from other creators. Why do you feel connected to them? What types of posts make you say, “Oh, I love her”? Then ask: how can I give my audience that same kind of connection, in my own way?

It Should Align with Your Values

Whether you’ve defined them or not, your brand has values. What you share — and what you don’t — should reflect those.

Take time to clarify your values if you haven’t already. You don’t need to filter every Instagram story through them, but having them written down will make this whole process easier.

It also helps you reframe this: deciding what to share as a personal brand isn’t about being polished or perfect. It’s about building trust while honoring your own boundaries.

Share for Connection — Not Just Content

Sometimes when people ask me what they should share, I can feel the robotic energy behind it. They’re treating it like a checklist. And while consistency matters, you’re still a human running a personal brand.

That’s why it feels weird to show up like you’re talking to a friend — even though your followers aren’t actually your friends. That dynamic creates the tension we’re talking about. You want to be relatable, but you also want to keep some things private, which is normal.

So how do you balance it?

• Share what you’re comfortable with
• Keep what you’re not
• Make decisions ahead of time so you’re not second-guessing in the moment

Let people in without letting them all the way in.

Final Thoughts

Deciding what to share as a personal brand gets easier the more you do it. Start with your values. Use your gut. Share what feels fun and honest. Skip what doesn’t. You can be likable, trustworthy, and relatable without being an open book.

And no, you don’t have to post your kids, your body hair, or your relationship details to build a strong brand. You just need to be yourself — the version of yourself you’re happy to show online.

Need more support with building a personal brand that balances strategy and authenticity? You might like: How to Increase Your Instagram Engagement in 2024